Creeper issues, doctors, upcoming visits

I have a new creeper problem on my hands, and no, I’m not referring to actual creepers for once.

At the beginning of the summer, I told the interns that I’d just resurrected my creepshow watch blog, which documents the unsolicited attention I receive from creeper dudes. Unsurprisingly, I wasn’t the only one to have these kind of awkward encounters. The interns appreciated some of my odd blog posts and even submitted their own creeper stories. For the longest time, we joked about nothing but creepers throughout each day.

But now that July is winding down and it’s time for most of the interns to return to college (insert tearful face here), it’s clear that we’ve overused and killed the word “creeper.” It’s time, Nikki says, to replace it with something that has yet to lose its luster.

Some suggestions are:
1. Lurkers (coined by Nikki)
2. Skulkers (h/t Scott Risings)
3. The French translations: chelou and louche
4. Sketchball (created by yours truly)

We can always return to the cleverer “creepshow” and “creepsters,” but if I’m going to spend any more time ranting about weird men, I need to be a little more creative with my word choice. Let me know if you have any tips for me.

The interns are leaving tomorrow, but I’m not ready to talk about that right now, so expect a maudlin, florid post on these wonderful contributors sometime this weekend. Trust me, I have a lot to say about this incredibly motivated batch of aspiring journalists. Each and every one of them astounded me with their drive, willingness to work, enthusiasm, overall spirit, candor, and work ethic. I’ll go on and on about them soon enough, and there’s a good chance I’ll weep in the writing process.

In even worse news, I’m overdue for another eye doctor’s visit. I may not need glasses, but with an astigmatism, I need to see the optometrist again. The only problem is that I fainted on my last trip to the optometrist due to anxiety about others touching my eyes (it’s a fairly common problem among opto patients), so I worry it will happen again.

When I mentioned this to my sister, she gave me something else to fear.

“If you don’t fix astigmatisms, you could acquire a lazy eye. Hows that for terrifying?” she asked.

With that, I’ll schedule an appointment STAT and warn the new doctor beforehand that I passed out on my last unsuccessful eye doc visit. Hopefully I won’t need to deal with those invasive eye drops this time.

Speaking of eye doctors, my optometry student buddy Crystal is coming to D.C. next week! Catching up is in order. I already have butterflies in my stomach about it, as Crystal is the closest thing I’ve ever had to a soulmate.


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