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This whole high heels experiment doesn’t seem to be working, at least not for my healing toe. Summer wasn’t the time for me to start roaming the city in cute professional shoes. A family friend broke her toe twenty years ago and it hasn’t been the same since, so I hope I don’t encounter the same fate with my own bum toe. It’ll be all flats, all the time for the next month.

Row of DOOM!

On the bright side, I received two Thank You notes from interns yesterday. Three other interns gave me Thank You cards a few weeks ago, so I’m happy to have resonated with these students. Their letters cheered me up, so anytime I feel morose or useless, I’ll be sure to dig up the interns’ personal messages to me.

Though I miss their presence and energy, there’s no going around the fact that I’m much more productive now that the majority of the interns have finished up their run at the Daily Caller. I’m writing more stories, going on fewer coffee breaks and walks, and talking less. I may be on task, but there’s no substitute for laughter and good company. The interns always brightened my mornings with their motivation, curiosity, and hunger for journalism. They put a smile on my face after the 8:30 meeting and lightened the mood of the newsroom, putting my high strung personality at ease for a while. I miss lunch excursions to Shake Shack and Chipotle, caffeine runs to Starbucks and Firehook, and CVS adventures with Nikki.

If you read my farewell blog post to intern Nikki, I’ll have you know that we chat constantly. She’s been back in Reno for a little more than a week and already has dozens of outrageous stories to tell. I knew she’d have the time of her life out west, and I can’t wait to meet up with her in Vegas in the coming months. Planning is in order, but once I’m there, we’re going to have a blast. You’d have to be a monk not to have fun around Nikki. A couple of times a week, I’ll receive a late night drunk text from her and laugh to myself in bed. You see, I get annoyed by other inebriated texters (because they’re usually inconsiderate douchebag guys who have zero class), but I’ll always experience a rush of excitement upon hearing from Nikki.

Tomorrow will be intern Chris and Ameena’s final day at the office, so their absence will definitely be felt on Friday. Luckily I work Sunday through Thursday, so I’ll have the weekend to process the change. Hopefully they took something away from their time at TheDC. I sure benefited from their contributions!

Earlier today, I wrote two stories on “Jersey Shore,” and the first of which explains why Abercrombie & Fitch offered the show’s cast members a “substantial” amount of money not to wear the clothing brand.

“We are deeply concerned that [‘Jersey Shore’ star The Situation’s] association with our brand could cause significant damage to our image,” an A&F spokesperson said in a statement. “We have also extended this offer to other members of the cast, and are urgently waiting a response.”

Additionally, I wrote about the upcoming “Jersey Shore Studies” academic conference, which intends to explore the reality show in a scholarly way. You better believe the event is on, and I’m sure its not the last of its kind. My editor hit some bumps in the road as he edited this piece, eventually asking me, “Laura, dumb question probably, but tell me what GTL sessions are.” That was almost as amusing as the time intern Michael Mayday approached me and said, “What are the Kardashians? I’ve been hearing all about this thing and have no idea what anyone is talking about.” I tried explaining the Kardashian family history to him on several occasions, but none of it clicked. He left the internship with zero knowledge on the Kardashians. As far as he’s concerned, they’re a breed of animal or disease (although some would agree on the latter). Michael never really figured out that they’re people, and high profile ones at that. I failed him as a mentor, huh?

There’s still hope for some. Today, intern Chris did an excellent write-up on KISS rocker Gene Simmons’s prediction that Rick Perry will win the 2012 presidential election.

“Gov Perry worked for Al Gore and then switched to Republican. He will be our next President. I’ve never been wrong,” Simmons wrote on Twitter.

In other news, K-Fed just welcomed his fifth child into the world. Do you think he’ll stop there or sire five more before his 40th birthday?

I hope I haven’t burned you out with all my funny Google search term posts, but today’s findings are too odd to save for later. Here are the most recent weird phrases that people have Google searched to arrive at my blog:

girls pictures
rotten food
southern belle big ass
jerkoffinstructors.net pass
my doctor is a creeper
ugly rotten cheese
gym themed cupcakes
baby dumbo
hillbilly girls
big nasty brown flying bug
tacos
fda
university of arizona where to live instead of coronado (Coronado was the party dorm. I lived there for a year but recommend any other residence hall!)
asian woman texting
friendships about girls
my rainbows with no “my rainbow sandals”
georgetown cupcake wedding
tapioca pearl
mean girls 2 anti plastics
nevada bachman dating valentine’s day
snooki in high school skinny
bear bed
laura (age 47) donovan
“crystal and lauren” sex
sister jerk off (eww)
friendly north dakotans
tiger cub for event
heels
burgu

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